WW”e” Disrespects The Fans & Re-signs “The Kink”
Posted by: Krazy Loop on 11/21/2004

In an amazing turn of events, the WW”e” recently re-signed Jerry “The Kink” Lawler to a five year contract. What the WW”e” was thinking when it did this is beyond all sanity.

To say that the fans everywhere are disappointed is an understatement. In practical terms this means that those who can hold their noses long enough will have to suffer through years of watching Lawler stinking up arenas around the country and listening him pollute the airwaves with his juvenile nonsensical bombast. As if the quality of RAW hasn’t been poor enough for a long time already, in no small part due to “The Kink,” now the fans have a new reason not to watch. The only event the fans might be willing to see in conjunction with Ole’ Kink as a commentator would be a “Stacy Carter Invitational PPV.”

Earlier this year Linda McMahon indicated that the WW”e” was going to listen to the internet wrestling fans and give them what they wanted. In recent short straw poll, the fans we know said the match they most wanted to see is a “Paleolithic Death Match” between “The Kink” and Ancient Boy Ric “Medicare” Flair. The rules of this match are simple. Both contestants must be between the ages of 65 to 100. Falls are irrelevant since if either one of them falls down it is doubtful that they could ever get up without assistance. The winner of the match is the last man breathing, on or off life support. The loser must show no visible signs of life due to hardening of the arteries or other old age malady. The winner will receive a lifetime supply of Depends.

Linda, do you feel me? On second thought, keep your hands to yourself.

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