OH Brother Where Art Thou Tour
Posted by: Honky Tonk Man on 03/26/2005

The HTM XXX rated "Oh Brother Where Art Thou Spring Break Jake's Crack Pipe On A Pole Wet T-Shirt Tour" has ended with 8 very successful tour stops. HTM kicked the whole thing off in Switzerland on 3/12 where the fans where screaming for more.

The tour then went to Austria on 3/13 where the fans again were treated to signing, dancing, and some damn brutal guitar tunes by HTM. After a long flight of Vodka and Gatoraide, the tour hit Payson, Arizona on 3/16 for a quickie one night stand. Again the fans could not believe the energy and excitement HTM brought to this audience.

Thursday saw a travel day to Canada where HTM shocked Canadian Immigration. When asked by a young INS agent what was HTM's purpose of his visit to Canada, HTM replied, "Hell, I don't know." A stunned agent then realized it was the greatest WWE IC champion of all time and asked for a signed photo. HTM obliged and signed for several agents as hundreds of other people waited in line to be processed into Vancouver.

Friday 3/18 the HTM tour made a big stop in Surrey, British Columbia. A sold out crowd was on hand to see HTM battle BC legends Michelle Starr and Johnny Canuck in Canuck's retirement match. This was a real free for all where blood flowed like wine. Again the fans were treated to HTM's full throttle performance.

Saturday 3/19 HTM brought the Oh Brother Jake's Crack Pipe On A Pole Tour to mid town Vancouver. Another sold out crowd watched another blood battle between HTM and Michelle Starr. The fans were in a heated rage by the end of the match. They were 100% HTM followers while chanting Honky, Honky during the match. These fans left the building exhausted from the excitement and brutality of one of HTM's best performances this year.

Sunday 3/20 HTM took the tour for a 2 hr. plane ride north to Prince George, BC. HTM who never wears socks with his Jimmy Buffet sandals, was greeted in Prince George with a foot or so of snow and 0 degrees weather. The HTM Tour warm up suit was not enough to keep him from freezing his testicles damn near off. The show was packed with fans who also saw first hand what a great guitar player HTM is as he put and end to the show with "smashing" performance. The poor Mauler suffered a slight knot on his head! Another great stop for this never ending tour as the fans were thrilled to see a real legend perform, not some fat, saggy, gray haired OH Brother who lays on his ass for a payday.

Monday 3/21 HTM was up by 10am and headed back to Vancouver for another quick stop at the Pub Med in Burnaby, BC for a RAW party at the bar. The fans packed the place and waited in long lines just to get inside to watch RAW and mingle with HTM. They were treated to HTM's live version of the song that started the HTM's journey that will never die.

Tuesday 3/22 on a late flight back to his beloved Phoenix HTM had time on the flight to look back at the days gone by. He thought of all the paths he had crossed and all the crossroads he had approached where decisions had to be made. He smiled to himself knowing he had only himself starring back at him in every mirror he looks in. He only sees the person who is there, and that is him. With that thought the HTM Tour had to get ready for Friday 3/25.

HTM's wake up on Friday was 5am. The tour headed to Seattle for a show in Fife, Washington. Another huge event where the Elks Lodge ran out of beer before intermission. When HTM questioned the Elk about the lack of beer, the Elk replied, "I did not think there would be this many people." The match saw HTM battle another BC and Great Northwest Legend Diamond Tim Flowers. HTM has known Tim since his days when he left Calgary to work in Vancouver for Al Tomko who ran BC All Star Wrestling. The Fife fans saw HTM in another bloody battle as he and Flowers fought through out the building. Again the fans could not believe the intensity HTM showed in this match.

With all this behind us now. The HTM tour has to re-charge and get ready for a big stop Sat. 4/2 in Bland, VA and the back to the east the following week to a huge event with WWE's Sgt. Slaughter in Bulter, PA on 4/9. April 15 we take off for a 10 day tour of Nova Scotia.

Till we meet again,
Adios

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