Before we go any further, I must stress how much I despise the word "Diva", which to me signifies being a prima donna, in addition to being a word popularized by the gay community in describing their favorite "fabulous" (another word no straight man should use) songstresses. Unfortunately, for this reason I don't identify the term with empowering the WWE's women, but instead get visuals of guys named Bruce discussing if "salmon" is indeed a color.

In the past, WWF Women's wrestlers didn't exactly fit the svelte mold of today's plastic princesses, as frankly the majority of the female competitors of that bygone era were built like a wet bag of laundry. There certainly was no Magazine shoots for these women, as if you really wanted to see unattractive potato shaped women wearing loud floral-print bathing suits, you could just go to any local beach.

The turning point in the industry came in 1996 when an influx of young attractive female valets ushered in the Attitude era by parading around the ring much to the delight of teenage heroes everywhere who'd pin their Sunny posters to their ceilings so they could look into her glazed-over eyes as they achieved their ridiculousnessly inept climaxes.

Soon there after the WWF expected just a little more from the eye candy, as under the Vince Russo era, these same Women were now expected to take bumps in the ring, all the while trying to keep their plastic parts from flopping out in front of a nationwide audience. Eventually, these one or two women turned into a full division, and progressed to the point where we are today.

The Divas continue to draw a lot of revenue for the company, and WWE's mold of what a woman is remains very appealing to us Neanderthals out there.

The funny thing about the WWE is that they paint a very simplistic view of women in their world of Entertainment, as any women with any aggressive or devious tendencies tends to be painted as a jezebel or "evil". Still, despite the majority being made with a lot of the same parts as my first edition He-Man toys from the early 80's, men still flock to see these cookie-cutter types roll around the ring regardless, as we often forgive the fact that the matches themselves are about as impressive as a virgin hand-job.

The funniest thing of all is how the REAL women in our lives react to the Divas. "They're not real you know" says the girlfriend, speaking of Jackie Gayda's immobile basketball like chest. "I can squeeze them, that's real enough for me" I answer channeling my inner Jack Black. It absolutely baffles me how much women despise one another. It's actually hilarious. With this said, if women were really running the World, issues would be settled in an entirely different manner, as George Bush, rather than launching an all out assault on Iraq, would instead just tell people that Saddam had a 'fat ass' and Hussein would in turn spread the rumor that George was a "whore" behind his back. What women don't understand is that we're attracted to the IMAGE that these women are presenting. Sure we know it's not reality, but that doesn't much matter. It's actually no different than the way they fantasize about John Q. Funboy on their afternoon soaps, daydreaming that he will whisk them away to a private island. We on the other hand simply want a night with a rough and ready fantasy woman who'll aggressively play us like a porn-star minx while just stopping short of using our balls as a boxing speedbag.

To see this theory in action, look no further than the reaction to Trish Stratus turning "Heel". While the WWE had high hopes that turning the good girl-next-door Trish "bad" would generate hatred amongst the masses, it has somehow strangely had the opposite reaction instead making her EVEN MORE attractive. What is it about a woman who would as soon bite off your penis-head and spit it out like a discarded sun-flower seed than save your life? Is it that deep down, we really want a woman to kick the shit out of us? I don't know, but whatever it is it's working.

Times have indeed changed, as today's WWE Diva is expected to be built, pretty, and have at least a modicum of wrestling talent. Some like Trish work hard to improve their craft, while others like Torrie just go through the motions, but gone are the days of lumpy women built like your Grandmother exchanging armlocks and hair-mares, and in are women like Stacy, just stopping short of pulling a full blown ham-sandwich on national TV while choking her opponent with her foot in the corner.

With that said, I for one am glad times have changed, because frankly, I never wanted to masturbate to Moolah....or did I?

S.C.